Relationships that are short and bitter [or I read the same book too, you mutha]

Last year or thereabouts I bought a book called The Game by Neil Strauss. And in it, it details the life of a pick up artist and how step by step to pick up women.

I figured the whole picking up thing would be useful [one day] so I did a basic memorisation of the steps- it goes like this:

1. Get the girls attention with a comment- doesn't have to be useful.

2. If shes with a friend, ignore her.

3. When you finish ignoring her, pay attention to her a bit.

4. Put her down so she feels insecure.

5. Touch her on the arm to gage a reaction. Forget it if she flinches

6. Pick up three signs that she's interested. Not flinching. Laughing at your joke. Staying put after your put down.

7. If successful then isolate and you're in her pants!

Anyway being a fully fledged clubling- I'm very careful to take note of people pulling these kinds of pick ups. I guess it really depends on the guy as well and his execution.

So Smiley came up to me today.

S: Hey hows it going??
M: Good. Feeling better?
S: Yes.

And then he proceeds to talk about the most random shit ever compiled. He watched the tennis and went to the bank. [Step 1: Engage in conversation]

And while he's talking to me about this miscellaneous miscellaneous. He touches me on the arm constantly and he pretty much gets right up in my personal space, which makes me paranoid that my face is dirty. Anyway. [Step 4: Keep touching her. If she doesn't back away- Good sign!]

And then he went to step 5# and this is where he completely failed. By this time I'm thinking.. I've also read that book buddy?

In the middle of all this randomness, he takes a deep breath and says:
Your mouth is open when you work. That's really weird. It looks weird.

And I stop and I'm flabbergasted. "Thanks? What? Thanks?" [I should've mentioned I breathe when I work but it escaped me because I'm too busy staring at him. With my mouth open. Ironically]

He sees me goggling, and he starts to backtrack. "I'm just pointing it out.. umm.. ahh.." and then he goes back to step 5. Touch her! save it! ahhh!

This time, I shrug him off and head back into the kitchen without a backwards glance.

Now the books says according to that step, when you put her down, you should point out that she has wonky fingers or big feet or something like that. The book doesn't even have to say don't ever ever make a judgmental comment on a womans face. It doesn't need to be said! OMG.

Of course when I get to the kitchen and I jump on Campbell with "HE SAID THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY FACE." and she looks at me and says "There's nothing wrong with it. What is he talking about?"

Lighto [who is just an angry angry boy lately] says: What the fuck! Tell him he's an ugly &*%^&*#%$&*#^$&*! Did you say that?!"
"Um. no."

Look, if I be nice about this I figure that Smiley is just a guy who doesn't know how to talk to women. However, three conversations in and I also think the guy is massively massively dopey.

This is why I should crush from faraway. When I talk to them in person- they end up as massive douchebags.

---

I was talking to Lighto and I said "Whats new?"
He answers me all glum "I'm fighting with my girlfriend"
"Oh. What happened?"
"I don't know! She won't tell me!" [Heehee. Sorry, I've done this before and I really just wanted Sb to annoy me about it til I yelled at him and could get it all out in one go]
"Oh. Did you ask her?"
"Of course! But I don't care anymore! I'm not going to do anything anymore! I'm sick of it!"
"You don't... care..?"

"No, I don't and if she [expletive] annoys me [expletive] anymore [expletive] I'm going to [expletive] dump [expletive] her!"
"Wow. Um."

Last year, Lighto would've laid on a railtrack for her. I spent a lot of time trying to explain to him that he was insane. And he would verily dismiss me as "You're too young. What do you know about love?" [Nothing!] and I'd roll my eyes and the conversation would end.

I wonder if he promised his girlfriend he'd love her forever too. Men and the promises they make. In all honesty, I think I preferred when he was in love and all floaty.