Big stupid rock and big stupid weddings

The other day my housemate Mystic Meg came home with a suspicious looking little box for me. She said "Here."
I looked at it and said "Um... should I be worried?"
She laughed and when I opened it, there was a big ol' fake wedding ring in there with an overly large cubic zirconia in the middle [I may be optimistic- it could be plastic]
I looked at it "So I'm finally being proposed to huh?.. What am I supposed to do with this thing??"
She started to laugh and walked out the door "Just make sure the next guy who proposes to you- gives you something bigger than that!
"No seriously, what am I supposed to do with this??"

***

A few months ago, someone I knew was getting married and said to me "Huh, I always thought you were going to get married before me. Shouldn't you have been married like four years ago?"

Me: ..[pissed off silence]..

***

So all of a sudden all these people [about three or four] that I know have suddenly gotten married to their boyfriends of six months. And I'm thinking 'What the hell just happened? Did I suddenly miss a rush on weddings? Is there a two for one on wedding gowns that I don't know about?!Is the apocalypse coming?!!" Not bitter at all. I know.

Ok the noble part of me says "These are my friends/acquaintances! They have found happiness, everlasting devotion and true love!" and the less noble, more petty side of me thinks "There's no way. A year of knowing somebody .. man, I've known people for years and found out that I didn't really know them at all. I doubt, I doubt, I doubt." And then the noble side says "Shut up and stop voicing things out loud."

I mentioned this to Betty the other day about this recent explosion of marriages and she immediately understood by saying what I was thinking- "I don't understand what happened- we were supposed to be first." And then we both looked sad and had to change the topic to hot firemen.

***

Campbell asked me to go to Tiffany's with her today.
"What for?"
"Oh John wanted to know the size of my ring finger"
"Sure chicks, whenever you want"
"I'm going to get married in the botanical gardens.. ! and I can't decide where to hold the reception..."
Sigh. I guess I'm not getting away from the wedding talk.