Peanut Butter= Orgasm

When I was fifteen I started developing allergies. Not haha allergies, but allergies that blew my hands up to Mickey Mouse proportions. For weeks I was waving my man hands in peoples faces. When I went to the doctor he said I was allergic to [deep breath]

prawns.
lobsters.
yeast.
certain types of grass

and.. peanuts!

peanuts!

I had to give up my beloved peanut butter to save my hands.

At any point, during these last nine years my allergies have subsided enough so that I can eat most of these foods [you have no idea how cranky I've been at family dinners when lobster and crab were passed around and all I had was strawberry ice cream and fried rice]

but I haven't had peanut butter til today.

And Oh Lord, it was a reunion in my mouth, I sat there with a jar of it frantically shovelling it down my maw. I think at one point I let out an audible sob.



So peanut butter, my bestest buddy, my soulmate- we are once again reunited. Fate shall not divide us again! [Its crunchy all the way, none of that wussy smooth stuff]