Friday, January 18, 2008

I came back from Japan with anime disgust

Man I'm so mopey lately, well not really mopey.. I'm just sort of spaced out lately. I think I'm on book withdrawal, all I've been doing is playing my DS. Yeah, I don't think that sounds particularly healthy either, I'm making up for all the years that my stepbrothers wouldn't let me play on the gameboy [sigh, tetris]

Anyway, onto other things .. there are many things I'm scared of, roaches, heights, germs.. I'm a veritable -phobe. [If you'd like to destroy me put me on a cliff with some insects and a leper that likes to play tag, I'll guarantee that I'm a screaming mess by the time you retrieve me] anyway I seem to have brought back another fear from Japan, I'm slightly icked about by anime [ok, completely ooged]

Well when I was eleven? I thought that the big eyed small nose look was cool, I spent countless hours trying to recreate the look on paper. Of course when I was sixteen I watched Ghost in the Shell and I almost threw up when I saw the robot get ripped apart and veins and arteries start to spurt everywhere. I didn't really finish the movie. There starts my disenchantment with anime.

When I was twenty [and successfully fended off years of anime watching by sheer refusal] SB decided to watch this anime where the girls get raped by giant trees. Oog. Branches in vaginas. Who wants to be caressed by a penis which looks like a tree?! [Tree fairies? squirrels? botanists?]

And then Saffron decided on a night where we were both bored to show me a hentai where a woman was being tortured, they attached electric clamps to her ma-jiggy which simultaneously burned and climaxed her at the same time. Afterwards, in which she peed [I guess electrocuting yourself there will cause bladder loss, yes.]

I one day plan to sit Saffron down and explain to her why shows like that are unhealthy.

so back to Japan, the land of anime. I mean how bad can it be if I just stick to ordinary things like DragonBall and Hello Kitty? I'm sure I can avoid the really bizaare stuff if I just concentrate on.. shoes.. no such luck. The weird stuff is everywhere! In the toy stores, there'll be naked figurines with double J cups [create your own naked person!], or in the bookstores there'll be entire floors of gay comic porn. Which is fine, but apparently its aimed towards women. Apparently Japanese women like slash. I can't explain it. [This is the part where I write some pseudo theory about Japanese women being oppressed and manifesting it into slash comics where the 'feminine' have power. Shut up. Its a theory in progress]

So I'd be studiously avoiding and then something oogy would pop out at me [like posters of naked children in seductive poses]. Its FINE. I'll just walk into another aisle where Sgt Frogs head is exploding or something, I mean I'm not going to close my eyes, just because I find anime depressing and sexist.

And then we walked into the anime expo [thanks lonely planet.. for your crap advice], and I stood next to the life size version of these characters.. and I was just completely icked out by them [this never happens with Mickey Mouse!] they're just so out of proportion and plasticky and wrong looking that I was just gaping at them. Sb was impatient and said can you just pose next to them?! and I'm gingerly placing myself next to them and thinking this is someones fantasy? Uhh.. big eyes are pretty. Eyes the size of saucers are likely to have me gropiing for the door handle and fleeing into the night. Also if your breasts are bigger than your head [Wah! sexist! bugging. me.] theres not much chance you're going to do much than just sit on the floor with your head on the ground, because your neck has snapped off and you're paralysed.

So there we go, I officially have barred anime. I hate anime. Its creepy and sexist.



[Ok there are plenty of you who think this chick is hot. There are also plenty of you who have horse fetishes, so no judgment here]

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ha ha aha ha! I love it. It was as if I were walking with you on your journey. I fully understand what you are talking about. I like some anime but the majority I stay away from. Many say that american animation is inferior to anime, which I whole heartedly reject. They copied us and Donald Duck would kick any of their behinds. The only reason most like anime is because of some of the perverse stuff that goes on. Stuff that they would do or like to see in person but can't so they watch it in the only safe place, Television.

Anonymous said...

well maybe you shouldn't watch shows like that, i mean i like anime, but i don't like the torturing sexist part of it.
but not all of it is that way so...and most of the people in the world just wanna see the girls get raped so thats why its a huge sellout but why hate it just for that?

Anonymous said...

Geeze, not ALL anime is like that. honestly, Not all are sexist and degrading, and likewise, other countries do the same thing. so if your going to condemn Anime, condemn all cartoons... and hell, even live action shows! and as for sexist.. Take a real look at Disney and there females; Minny, Arial, Snow White, Alice...... Same thing, only hidden a bit better so kids wont see.

Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha ha! Really great, I understand what you are talking about here, there is a lot of stuff like such floating around. I don't like anime as such but ALL of my friends do (gets kinda annoying actually) and if there is one thing I have noticed is that it is very addicive, seriously, think about it there are thousands and thousands of people lining up to see this stuff, and then there are all the people inside Japan, "now fair go, there are heaps of things like that, just look at Harry Potter," I hear you say, well this stuff becomes unhealthy, my friend cannot get anything inside his brain unless it has giant eyes and a tiny nose. Listen to Macca, I keep away from it, its more addictive than herroin, and twice as bad for you.

Anonymous said...

We are living in a male dominating society, believe it or not, even though there have been alot of changes! I hope that when you actually see what is happening in even western society today, that you do not become too depressed!

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with you!!!!
Anime is basically all about girls with volleyball sized breasts and gigantic eyes with tiny waists and hips. Is this what they want women to look like? What the hell!

Anonymous said...

do not class anime by a small % of it its not all tree rape and "J" cups there are some cool smart lygit shows like death note and Huruhi i draw the stuff and love the stuff there is some brutle gross things put out in the form of anime but thats just a small portion "Anime Is Great"-Doctor Klock

Anonymous said...

For all of you that are Anime Haters: Back Off! Anime is not sexist as a whole, (most is quite the opposite in fact). I'm not forcing any views here, but its annoying to see people calling anime porn while I'm thinking: "don't they realize what got me off porn?"
nuf said'

Anonymous said...

I know exactly what you mean! well, I do like the cuteness of it, they look really cute, like, the little girls. but i hate it when i'm just innocently looking for pictures of cute anime for my blog, and all of a sudden im looking at this anime girl with SHINY breasts bigger than their heads, wearing clothes that look like they came out of a paper shredder. I hate those perverted guys that draw this stuff. I mean, there really good artists, but there talent is WASTED! its so stupid the way that insanely good anime artists are PERVERTS! It's SOOOO STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

A lot of the best anime started off as hentai. Anyway, sex is built into our genes, it's natural. Besides, non-artists see a drawing of nude woman, or a nude anime character, and go "eww that's perverted," but it's different for an artist, the female body is natural, full of curves and shapes, it just begs an artist to draw it. The people who say it's disgusting for the good artists to do hentai are just on a different wave length, you've been taught by society that porn or hentai is something to be ashamed of, but the Japanese have broke away from those boundries and discovered that sex is nothing to be ashamed of. Also, about the Japanese copying us and Donald Duck would kick their behinds? Congratulations, you win the coveted "foot in mouth" award. The Japanese were among the first countries to make comics, and the Greek had animation in the form of pottery, turn the pottery and you would see a figure move, animation has been around a lot longer than the U.S. has, There were even moving pictures in the 1700's. The most popular anime doesn't have any of that "Stuff." If you're going to bash anime just because it has a few genres with sex in it, then you should bash movies, comics, and the internet. Before you judge, learn the facts.

The Japanese might have a lot of lot of sex and "perversion" in anime, but the U.S. controls the porn industry and the internet. The U.S. leads the world in under-age pregnacy, rape, and murder, while Japan has among the lowest crime rates in the world.

 
/>