Sad summer days

I haven't seen DarkAngel for over a year since he broke up with Mexicana, but I had to go to his place to pick up his guitar for my party.

So I turned up and he still looked the same, I tentatively asked him how he had been and he said that he hadn't been having a very good year.

So we would stood on his porch and talked and I was surprised by this sudden sense of loss.

The four of us Mexicana, DarkAngel, SB and I would never go back to those days- bright summer days of so many possibilities. We no longer have the comfort of those dinners and that company. Each of us having gone our own separate ways. The loss of that kind of easiness.

I remember the petty fights and the irritations, angry partners stalking off and stony silences, the inability of any of us to pick some place to eat. But after all that, there was the laughter- the laughter was almost at a constant level and when it stopped we made our own, we told jokes, we danced in the street, we amused ourselves any way we could.


And so I felt a little more than a twinge as I left, it was an extremely pretty day and I couldn't think of anyone I really wanted to share it with. I called SB but he didn't pick up.
"You're crazy Mush" and I slapped myself upside the head.

"Crazy notions of past happinesses are interfering with your ability to drive! So you have to sack up and wipe your eyes because you're swerving! Crossing! the! line! Eeeeek!"

I was happy to get home and just be miserable on my couch without endangering any pedestrian lives. It really was a pretty day.