Seeing Yooj

**There I go again with the whole deleting thing. Now you see it and now you don't I guess.

And I'm awake again at 4. Thank you heart twisting nausea. Nauseating heart twists. Both.

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I guess I've just decided to not talk about it [hello elephant in room] until I feel a bit less achey. I don't know when that will be, two days? two months? two years? Maybe I give up and blog everything tomorrow [today]. So let's talk about something else shall we?

So yesterday, I went into 711 to buy cigarettes [seriously, don't start with me on buying cigarettes, if anyone ever needed one it's probably me.] and I'm in a waking-coma when I enter, and then I hear someone call 'Mush!'
I look up and I see Yooj.
He throws me this most amazing smile, it's like all blinding white teeth and I'm so dazzled and it was so genuine that I couldn't help smiling back.
"Hey Yooj, long time no see."

We did the whole small talk thing for abt 30 seconds longer, and then he turned to leave. I was so thrown by the smiling thing [after a weekend like this one, I was pretty sure that the muscles around my mouth had disintegrated] that I didn't even ask about his sleeve. I really wanted to see it too.

I guess even though Yooj is friends with Matty and Sumo and is exed up with Tatergirl [wherever she is] I still don't actually know him that well, we run in parallel lines of mutual people but never joining [why is the North Shore so small??]. We spent quite a bit of time together that many years ago, and now that I think about it, I don't recall having a single conversation with him one-on-one.

What I do know is that Tatergirl hurt the holy crap out of him, and he hasn't dated anyone since.. which is a good four or so years ago. Four years! Four years is a crazy hella long time to be out of the game.

But you know what? He's doing really well [from all accounts] and he looks really good and he's come such a long way from the dour Yooj I knew from long ago. I guess what I'm trying to say is.. when I look around and see all the relationship car crashes around me [including my own, natch] that maybe taking some time off to not date is probably not such a bad thing. 3 months of R6 and 2 months of DS and whatever equilibrium I had left is completely fallen off the bicycle.

So here's to Yooj, a good person to emulate while I try and get back on my feet. The goal is to be well adjusted and smiley.

And now that I look out the window, I see that the sun has come out. Heart still aches like a mofo but maybe I'll try and see if I can get some sleep.