In my hands

Everytime I see Mystic Meg, I annoy her to read my palms. I don't know why, she never tells me anything that I want to hear.

So the night before last night I shoved my hand in her face and said "Well?! Tell me that someone is going to ride up in a Prius and then whisk me away to a tropical island where I can read books and eat sushi."

She starts pulling faces at my hand. Like real sour faces.

Mush: Seriously you had better stop fkn pulling those kinds of faces at my hand!

MM: SB is still there

Mush: Where?

MM: He's in your hand

Mush: Come again?

MM: That line runs too deep, you'll be together again in three years.

Mush: No, we won't

MM: Yes you will

Mush: Where is my Prius driving entrepreneur?

MM: Oh there's a couple. But they're so flash in the pan that they're minute.

Mush: THAT'S THE MOST INCREDIBLY CRAP NEWS EVER AND ARE YOU FKIN KIDDING ME??

MM: oh, and you're going to be at the casino for a couple more years.

Mush: Why are you saying these things to me? Do you secretly hate me?


I get on the phone to SB after

Mush: Mystic Meg says we're getting back together in three years. Where will you be? Maybe we should consider moving to different continents.

SB: .....................

You'd think by now he'd be used to getting these kinds of phone calls. He is
apparently not.

---

I had dinner with my parents last night. My stepdad also reads hands and so I waved my hand around and demanded a re-palm read.

Stepdad: She's all wrong. You have a guy coming in soon. Christmas. And that's not three years- that's three boyfriends. Three serious ones in your lifetime.

Mush: Christmas?

Stepdad: Also your career is fine, so relax. Not much coffee making left.

Mush: OMG. I love you.