I am almost close to the worst parker in the world. I for some reason have no perspective and cannot measure distance and so parallel parking always breaks me into a cold sweat.
Parallel parking on a hill gives me nightmares.
I live in a neighbourhood filled to the brim with Douches. Rich Douches. And everyone here owns two cars so parking is an apocalyptic shitfight.
A couple of months ago I was trying to park on the hill and I was close to tears because I had moved my car in and out about twenty times, a woman jogging past came up stood on the sidewalk and started guiding me and when she had finished she jogged away.
I to this day want to send her flowers.
Last Monday I was on another hill and I was trying to reverse when two men carrying rollerblades walked past. One man put his rollerblades down turned around walked behind my car and started guiding me as well. At one point my car started rolling backwards and he said "You don't have anymore room- you have to stop going backwards" and I said "I'm not. My car is rolling."
So he went and got a rock, put it behind my wheel and said "Ok. Now go."
When we were finished, he picked up his rollerblades and left.
Today I went to my doctor and told him I was stressed and overworked [I was telling this to a doctor. Um. He should've told me to shut it] and I needed help in getting that Hellpit to give me dayshifts. He looked at me sympatheticaly [and not telling me to shut it] asked me if I really needed to work myself into the ground.
I weakly replied "rent?"
And he nodded and said if I ever needed any help with the hellpit, he wouldn't hesistate to help me- don't worry about making an appointment just come and knock on my door. Here's my card- call and make sure I'm here.
I was gobsmacked. He sees seventeen billion people a day, most with cases umpteen times more serious than me and instead of shoving me out the door with his foot [which I guess I wouldn't have blamed him for if he did] he went above and beyond his hippocratic oath.
Sometimes life is terrible and people are mean and sometimes people are diamonds.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
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