If you ask me where I've been, I'm just going to say I was right here.
I have five different hats on this point and have had no time to dedicate to this blog. You may now commence scolding me on my disloyalty (are we in eight years in now? Jeebus.)
So I have my day job (my super awesome day job), I'm trying to put together a zine, I'm ever so slowly writing a novel, I'm still freelancing and I'm event managing for ND and so if you'd like to imagine how my apartment looks like right now- I don't think it's ever been this messy.
I am complaining and I'm not complaining. I love what I do- I love to write, I love to talk to people and there's been a plethora of cute boys coming by the office to shake my hand of late, but sometimes I want to just go home at 5 o clock, cook a roast chicken and watch back to back episodes of American Gothic/The Tudors/Freaks and Geeks.
And that means that my personal life is taking a backburner in more ways than one. About two months ago, my stepbrother and his partner flew in from Perth and we had all dinner together. They came again just recently and it was mentioned that I hadn't seen my mum the entire time. It was the running joke that they should visit more often so I can attend family dinners. It's not like me hey?
(I called my cousin Hexagirl just then and to multitask as I type this, it turns out that my great-uncle Jim just passed away. I don't think anybody was by his side and it occurs to me that the elders of my family are slowly slipping away. They worry that no-one will go to his funeral. How's that for an Ebenezer Scrooge type wake up call? I asked her what about his friends? won't they be at the funeral? And she said 'He was eighty. He probably had no friends left.' Which is probably true that no-one keeps a full social circle at that age)
My mum keeps telling me to call my dad. I think the whole Julia Gillard father thing has affected her more than she lets on.
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I'm letting my friendships slide too, and for once I think I'm okay with it. Who knew. Speedy and ND always tell me that I'm good at making friends, that even if I moved overseas and was there by myself, I would have nothing to worry about. I'm bubbly (when I want to be) and I'm good at establishing connections and keeping them there. It made me think about the stability of my friendships over the years, they lapse when I let them lapse. Of course some of them will be there forever like Dylmah and MD, I don't have to talk to them every week but there they are.
I just received a box of makeup in the mail and it was parceled with absurdly large bubble wrap. Which of course made me think of Mexicana and when we took a roll of bubble wrap and ran over it with the car (which today remains one of my favourite memories of all time) and so I just sat there popping this stupid large bubble wrap missing her. How do you like that for morbid sentimentality? It's not as if she's dead or anything, she's just 800km away and I want to talk to her about boys, stupid tv and zombie cannibals.
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(excerpted from the Gloss. Love that site.)
Ashley: Also, do you just look at the world in terms of who you could be friends with and who you couldn’t?
Jennifer: Of course. Don’t you?
Ashley: I do not!
Jennifer: Frankly, I could probably be friends with
anyone who was just really, really nice to me. Like, if Hitler came up
to me and was all “Jennifer, I am such a big fan! I think you are so
pretty and smart and nice. I bought you a goldfish. I like dogs.” I
would probably say, “You know, Hitler, you and I disagree on some
points, but I think I see the real you.”
Ashley: To everyone out there reading along in Gloss
land, she is absolutely fucking serious. I think that can be an
admirable trait, though, because I have really high expectations of
people and become absolutely crushed when they fail to meet them,
whereas you’d be friends with someone forever if they found out your
favorite cookie and baked a batch for you. And then, if that person
killed your family and fucked your dog, you’d be really angry until… well, until they made those cookies again. It’s crazy! You’re like a golden retriever in this way.
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ND and I went to Melbourne the other day (i.e I went home) and for the first time, I was not feeling it. I do not know why. If that's not home- then where the hell is it? Here's hoping it's just temporary diaspora.
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And then in an mmmbop you're not there. Signing out.
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