I follow a few blogs - mostly Asian lifestyle ones and I normally read them and think:
"God, I would not mind being paid to write, to put on makeup, to go on holiday and record what I ate for dinner."
That really does sound like the life to me (yes, I know. I'm not aiming very high.)
And then I bumped into a forum called Guru Gossip (not linking to it- sorrynotsorry)and it's essentially a forum where girls tear on girls. More specifically it's a dumping ground for forum readers to rip female bloggers to shreds.
Absolutely everything is up for claw-swiping dissection. How often you wash your hair, whether you've photoshopped your last picture, how ugly you used to look, how ugly you look now, eyes are too big, eyes are too small, your makeup is not in fashion, your voice is annoying, you've switched jobs more than once.. I think you get the idea.
All of the stereotypes on girls being their own worst enemy brought to life- although I haven't seen the word slut yet. Which is nice.
And suddenly being a lifestyle blogger doesn't sound so appealing to me. I'm never 100% happy with my appearance, it's true. But I don't need it to be magnified with people telling me they hate my teeth or something and I don't need you to tell me that the last thing I wrote was really dumb. I imagine that if I had to deal with that kind of criticism every day, I would spend a lot of time writing from under my bed.
So I guess I will keeps my posts untagged and keep doing things which are bad for SEO and be happy with the small amount of hits I have. Go your good self, little blog.
Monday, March 04, 2013
Sunday, March 03, 2013
What happened in February
I have rediscovered my love of Britney (not that it ever really left me) and while it's more conducive to running, it doesn't really put me in the mood for writing (what would be good for writing? Enya?).
So if you've missed me (which I know is a mighty assumption) I've been:
Busy ducking falling trees - That's next door's carport. The street wasn't much better. At 1:30 in the morning, there was a gigantic smashing noise which woke us up and ND hauled me flailing into the kitchen. Both of us thinking the stupid tree outside is finally going to fall and make its way through my window. Well it did, and it didn't, the tree(s) came down the other way- as you can see, some cars not so lucky. And you know at the very least I am reassured that ND is going to schlepp me to safety if I ever need it.
Making homemade dumplings
Not bad eh? Although I can't take credit for most of it (or all of it- I helped some!)
Celebrating CNY- It feels like I won't be getting red packets too much longer, so... I'm squirreling the excess money away. Like a miser. I can't think of any other instances where I get free money. Tax return? No, right?
Swallowing powdered collagen to stop my face from collapsing in on itself (kind of like a black hole)- the stuff is rank though and it smells like... I can't even describe the smell- 17 year old silica packets is the closest I can think of. The things I do to keep society from throwing me under a bus.
Watching a lot of River Monsters. It's my new favourite show. Five props for a program that can give that much serious profiling to Amazonian catfish that crawl up your butt in groups (groups!) and then eat you from the inside out in bullethole fashion (and for some reason everyone or another all these poor bodies wash up on a Monday. It's like they work on weekends.) - everyone else can keep their reality shows, I think I will stick with learning about violent parasitic, marine life. Huzzah!
Speaking of violent parasitic, marine life (that was an awkward segue) I tried watching Compliance yesterday. I made it through 15 minutes. I don't want to ruin it for you so I don't know how to explain it to you without my destroying it for you- I guess what I'm ineloquently trying to say is that I think everyone should have a go at watching it and then maybe reassess how susceptible we are to (intentionally or not) abusing our own personal power. If you come out and go, that's just dumb, I would never do that! Go back, take off your moral superiority hat and try again.
If you can't make it through the first fifteen though, I completely understand and this link will help you finish off the story- which is bizarre and insane. That's the only way I can describe it.
So if you've missed me (which I know is a mighty assumption) I've been:
Busy ducking falling trees - That's next door's carport. The street wasn't much better. At 1:30 in the morning, there was a gigantic smashing noise which woke us up and ND hauled me flailing into the kitchen. Both of us thinking the stupid tree outside is finally going to fall and make its way through my window. Well it did, and it didn't, the tree(s) came down the other way- as you can see, some cars not so lucky. And you know at the very least I am reassured that ND is going to schlepp me to safety if I ever need it.
Making homemade dumplings
Not bad eh? Although I can't take credit for most of it (or all of it- I helped some!)
Celebrating CNY- It feels like I won't be getting red packets too much longer, so... I'm squirreling the excess money away. Like a miser. I can't think of any other instances where I get free money. Tax return? No, right?
Swallowing powdered collagen to stop my face from collapsing in on itself (kind of like a black hole)- the stuff is rank though and it smells like... I can't even describe the smell- 17 year old silica packets is the closest I can think of. The things I do to keep society from throwing me under a bus.
Watching a lot of River Monsters. It's my new favourite show. Five props for a program that can give that much serious profiling to Amazonian catfish that crawl up your butt in groups (groups!) and then eat you from the inside out in bullethole fashion (and for some reason everyone or another all these poor bodies wash up on a Monday. It's like they work on weekends.) - everyone else can keep their reality shows, I think I will stick with learning about violent parasitic, marine life. Huzzah!
Speaking of violent parasitic, marine life (that was an awkward segue) I tried watching Compliance yesterday. I made it through 15 minutes. I don't want to ruin it for you so I don't know how to explain it to you without my destroying it for you- I guess what I'm ineloquently trying to say is that I think everyone should have a go at watching it and then maybe reassess how susceptible we are to (intentionally or not) abusing our own personal power. If you come out and go, that's just dumb, I would never do that! Go back, take off your moral superiority hat and try again.
If you can't make it through the first fifteen though, I completely understand and this link will help you finish off the story- which is bizarre and insane. That's the only way I can describe it.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
On being fanstruck
I don't get many (or any!) views on here since I stopped regularly writing and even fewer comments so I was expecting spam when I saw that I had comments on the Kurt Vonnegut post below.
Anyway the comment was: And where do we find Mush on Twitter? - Travis Langley.
I'm all 'why does that name sound so familiar?... *google google* OHMYGOD! He's the one who wrote the book I've been reading about Batman!'
If you just look to the right a little bit in the sidebar- there it is: "Batman and Psychology: A Dark and Stormy Knight"
So I sat there a little bit with stars in my eyes, dreaming of being whisked off to San Diego to write pop culture-y things. Maybe he'll know people at Comic Con. Maybe Comic Con will take me on board to help out with social media. Maybe he'll have read my blog and liked it and skipped past all the parts where I was embarrassing and awkward. And even having read my blog, he'll take me on as a sidekick (sidekicks are usually young right?).
Of course then my overworked brain decided to unfog for a second. What if I am being catfished? What if I am being Manti T'eo-ed? .. I don't even think SEO and or Google Alerts picks up on sidebars! Do they? (If so, I will have to get on that at work asap)
Ok well, if you ever come back Travis, I love your work! Please adopt me! I'll be good!
*I have two twitters for work but no personal one but seriously I am infinitely contactable on all other forms of social media.
**ND is watching me as I type this and said over my shoulder 'Can you please be careful- don't let that guy turn you into a nipple lamp.'
Anyway the comment was: And where do we find Mush on Twitter? - Travis Langley.
I'm all 'why does that name sound so familiar?... *google google* OHMYGOD! He's the one who wrote the book I've been reading about Batman!'
If you just look to the right a little bit in the sidebar- there it is: "Batman and Psychology: A Dark and Stormy Knight"
So I sat there a little bit with stars in my eyes, dreaming of being whisked off to San Diego to write pop culture-y things. Maybe he'll know people at Comic Con. Maybe Comic Con will take me on board to help out with social media. Maybe he'll have read my blog and liked it and skipped past all the parts where I was embarrassing and awkward. And even having read my blog, he'll take me on as a sidekick (sidekicks are usually young right?).
Of course then my overworked brain decided to unfog for a second. What if I am being catfished? What if I am being Manti T'eo-ed? .. I don't even think SEO and or Google Alerts picks up on sidebars! Do they? (If so, I will have to get on that at work asap)
Ok well, if you ever come back
*I have two twitters for work but no personal one but seriously I am infinitely contactable on all other forms of social media.
**ND is watching me as I type this and said over my shoulder 'Can you please be careful- don't let that guy turn you into a nipple lamp.'
Sunday, February 03, 2013
An hour before thirty.
Anyway two hours to go and thirty it is. Thirty! Wth. I have an amazing boyfriend, a job that I really enjoy and some really good friends and of course, I love my family. But I just feel like there are milestones that I haven't hit yet (property? property?! everyone stop talking to me about property!! The great Australian dream has turned into the great Australian pressure) and I really have to make up my mind about kids because frankly I don't think these eggs are that fresh anymore and so forth, so forth, so forth.
I talked to some friends about it and they (Thank God!) were also angsty in the week beforehand, so it's nice to know that I am not the only one emo-ing it up in the room.
Quick, quick! A brief rundown of things I loved so I can leave the overly analytical post for later
---
Things I loved in my tens: Cartoons, Dolly magazine, Roald Dahl, Prawn dumplings, The Lion King, The Grease Soundtrack, being in a clique, collecting stickers, slapbands, denim overalls, boys.
Things I loved in my teens: ICQ, Hanson, Empire Records, collared necklaces, headkerchiefs, sushi, silver clothing, my mobile, Midori Illusions, Asian biographies, anime.
Things I loved in my twenties: Alcohol, bubble wrap, hot dogs with shaved haloumi, random trivia, my ipod, my apartment, food trucks, travelling, Murakami.
--
Actually looking at that list, nothing much has changed hey! Time to go to bed. Tomorrow is a brand new day so they say.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Mentally 17
I have moved onto signing my dates with 2013 but I haven't found the necessary courage to write how I felt about 2012.
I'm not ready to be 30. And yet it's ridiculously inevitable- ready or not, here it comes.
I'm not ready to be 30. And yet it's ridiculously inevitable- ready or not, here it comes.
On 2012 last year
On 2012 last year.
"Beyond the politicians, the rest of us were being reshaped too. The first serious media impacts of what some of us like to call interconnectedness were being felt. Alan Jones called social media campaigns against him “cyberterrorism” which was not entirely off the mark, for social media campaigns like #destroythejoint or more temporary ones like the waves of rage against the 2DayFm royal prank are indeed about power and its use. Traditionally dominant analog media increasingly find themselves trapped in the same rituals of apology over and over again as the people formerly known by that engagingly passive term “audience” use social media to undermine their business model. That’s accomplished not so much by directly challenging media outlets as by challenging advertisers, who invariably figure discretion is the better part of valour.
The media has been told for a long time that the internet will bugger their advertising revenue. But no one told them it would happen courtesy of social media campaigns as well.
This had a particularly amusing outcome of upsetting powerful old white men, the sort of people not merely used to running things, but doing so in an unchallenged, and definitely unmocked, fashion. No matter where you looked this year, there was some privileged old white guy angrily denouncing things. Gerry Harvey or Solomon Lew or Ray Hadley or Alan Jones (Old White Guy primus inter pares), or the entire Republican Party (brilliantly condensed into Clint Eastwood railing at an invisible person, an act so laden with symbolism it deconstructed itself in real time), or the old men of The Australian, from Chris Mitchell down, powerful elderly males infuriated that the world no longer gives them automatic deference, let alone allows them to run things unchallenged. The result: the rage of the prostatetariat." - Bernard Keane.
If you want to read the rest of this piece, click here. I can't put it any better than the: rage of the prostatetariat. What a sentence.
"Beyond the politicians, the rest of us were being reshaped too. The first serious media impacts of what some of us like to call interconnectedness were being felt. Alan Jones called social media campaigns against him “cyberterrorism” which was not entirely off the mark, for social media campaigns like #destroythejoint or more temporary ones like the waves of rage against the 2DayFm royal prank are indeed about power and its use. Traditionally dominant analog media increasingly find themselves trapped in the same rituals of apology over and over again as the people formerly known by that engagingly passive term “audience” use social media to undermine their business model. That’s accomplished not so much by directly challenging media outlets as by challenging advertisers, who invariably figure discretion is the better part of valour.
The media has been told for a long time that the internet will bugger their advertising revenue. But no one told them it would happen courtesy of social media campaigns as well.
This had a particularly amusing outcome of upsetting powerful old white men, the sort of people not merely used to running things, but doing so in an unchallenged, and definitely unmocked, fashion. No matter where you looked this year, there was some privileged old white guy angrily denouncing things. Gerry Harvey or Solomon Lew or Ray Hadley or Alan Jones (Old White Guy primus inter pares), or the entire Republican Party (brilliantly condensed into Clint Eastwood railing at an invisible person, an act so laden with symbolism it deconstructed itself in real time), or the old men of The Australian, from Chris Mitchell down, powerful elderly males infuriated that the world no longer gives them automatic deference, let alone allows them to run things unchallenged. The result: the rage of the prostatetariat." - Bernard Keane.
If you want to read the rest of this piece, click here. I can't put it any better than the: rage of the prostatetariat. What a sentence.
Monday, January 28, 2013
I've been at home for two days
I am somewhat going out of my mind from being holed up in my apartment from rain for the last two days.
And then you know, I feel guilty because I have all the comforts of warmth, shelter and internet while I'm sitting here popping blueberries into my mouth and I'm not in a North Korean concentration camp digging ditches, slowly dying of malnutrition. And I'm complaining about rain of all things.
I often wonder what kind of quirk of fate sends one person here and one person there? If my great-great-great-grandfather had decided to walk on the left side of the street instead of the right, (assuming that my existence was somehow a given) would I be sitting in a hacienda in New Mexico instead? or skiing in Canada? or under someone's floorboards in Philadelphia a la Cold Case?
My mum followed my Aunty H here in the 70s because she just didn't want to be separated from her. At the time, Australia wasn't my Aunty H's first choice but for some reason or another, she changed her mind and here we all are... sitting here trying to wait out the rain.
I'm always thinking about what people are doing right now on the other side of the world, like that girl who served me at Aeropostale at Times Square (5:56am) I guess she's about to wake up? Or that pissy concierge from the hotel in Rome (11:52am), is he still standing there frowning pissily at papers? Probably. His is a 24 hour job and the tourists ave all checked out at ten. And then again it's 7:58pm in North Korea, so it's a late dinner for some family in Pyongyang- I can only guess at what they're eating.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
The Food Truck Journey
Last year I spent a lot of time chasing around food trucks. Also I spent a lot of time and effort dragging my friends out with me to look for them. I didn't really mind because it wasn't about the food but more on the pleasure of the company.
Also last year my little group of friends split in two and what can you do about it really.
I spotted the elusive food truck tonight and I think I must have squeaked in joy.The past is gone and that chasm will never be recovered but I like to think that when they see the photo on my facebook page, they feel a momentary fondness for the things that were.
I gripe.
So this is my resolution for this year.
I will not turn on any damn appliance on in the morning before I go to work. No iron. No curler. No stove.
Why? because even if I write it on my forehead or tattoo it on my hand, I am never 100% sure that I've switched anything off. Somehow a panic button flips in my head as soon as I reach the ferry and I have to turn back making me damn late. And the stupid thing is? the appliance is always off. Yeah I know.
This happened more than a couple of times last year and this morning was the final straw. By the time I did a circle back to the ferry, I was super sweaty and my hair (so painstakingly curled) had frizzed out to the before shot in a shampoo commercial.
Also I missed my ferry. again.
So never again, only cereal and baseball caps for me in the morning. Don't mention to me that my skirt is wrinkly lest I laserbeam you to death with my eyes.
I will not turn on any damn appliance on in the morning before I go to work. No iron. No curler. No stove.
Why? because even if I write it on my forehead or tattoo it on my hand, I am never 100% sure that I've switched anything off. Somehow a panic button flips in my head as soon as I reach the ferry and I have to turn back making me damn late. And the stupid thing is? the appliance is always off. Yeah I know.
This happened more than a couple of times last year and this morning was the final straw. By the time I did a circle back to the ferry, I was super sweaty and my hair (so painstakingly curled) had frizzed out to the before shot in a shampoo commercial.
Also I missed my ferry. again.
So never again, only cereal and baseball caps for me in the morning. Don't mention to me that my skirt is wrinkly lest I laserbeam you to death with my eyes.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
The domestic goddess returns
So jokingly (God, I hope jokingly) ND said to me the other day "your domestic skills need some work. So how about you go out and earn the six figure salary while I stay home and look after the kids?"
Scoff. "I facebook for a living. Unless I actually work for Facebook, I don't see six figures coming up anytime soon. How about you go out and earn the big bucks in finance and I stay home and watch said hypothetical children?"
And then I added defensively, "besides I'm pretty good at domestic things..like cooking"
That was an outright lie.
So I thought I would cook a frittata tonight and dazzle him with my similarities to Nigella Lawson. Of course Nigella would probably cook something more complicated than a frittata but whatever.
I'm slaving away, doubled over boiling pots and pans. Spilling things and generally making a mess of things when I come to the ridiculously obvious epiphany that I really don't damn like doing this.
I'm hot, I'm puffy, I'm bored. The sweat is making my glasses slide off my face. And I can't walk away to watch TV or something will burn.
Other people find the process soothing, they find it relaxing trying to decipher quantities of spice. People who love to cook to destress must be some higher form of yogi, because I can't find a single thing about it that's not completely stressful. One thing goes wrong and you're like Swedish Chef, unrecoverable and talking gibberish.
I take that back. I love the Swedish Chef. He's my hero.
So back to my frittata..
(Sorry, for some reason the picture won't rotate.)
Yeah I know my frittata turned into a makeshift omelette.
ND looked it and said "Is that bubble and squeak?"
Strangely enough, it tastes okay. But it's definitely not a frittata. So I guess I'll be the one heading out to the mines everyday?
Scoff. "I facebook for a living. Unless I actually work for Facebook, I don't see six figures coming up anytime soon. How about you go out and earn the big bucks in finance and I stay home and watch said hypothetical children?"
And then I added defensively, "besides I'm pretty good at domestic things..like cooking"
That was an outright lie.
So I thought I would cook a frittata tonight and dazzle him with my similarities to Nigella Lawson. Of course Nigella would probably cook something more complicated than a frittata but whatever.
I'm slaving away, doubled over boiling pots and pans. Spilling things and generally making a mess of things when I come to the ridiculously obvious epiphany that I really don't damn like doing this.
I'm hot, I'm puffy, I'm bored. The sweat is making my glasses slide off my face. And I can't walk away to watch TV or something will burn.
Other people find the process soothing, they find it relaxing trying to decipher quantities of spice. People who love to cook to destress must be some higher form of yogi, because I can't find a single thing about it that's not completely stressful. One thing goes wrong and you're like Swedish Chef, unrecoverable and talking gibberish.
I take that back. I love the Swedish Chef. He's my hero.
So back to my frittata..
(Sorry, for some reason the picture won't rotate.)
Yeah I know my frittata turned into a makeshift omelette.
ND looked it and said "Is that bubble and squeak?"
Strangely enough, it tastes okay. But it's definitely not a frittata. So I guess I'll be the one heading out to the mines everyday?
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Random thoughts for this weekend
First of all I stayed in almost all this weekend (which is a change) and watched in this order:
- Man, I am really broke. Broke, broke. Not quite living on the street but if I don't stop spending money on expensive shampoo, I'm gonna get there.
- I had the Life of Pi ending all wrong (for how many years?!) until I watched the movie and had it spelled out for me. Shame shame.
- I still don't know why Lance Armstrong has chosen to come out now?? Dude, I don't know why you didn't just stick with ambiguity.
- Quokkas are damn cute. See? Who could resist a face like that?
- Ray, when someone asks you if you're a God, you say yes!
- ND and I play a game called douche menu where we try and turn ordinary food into an item on a fine dining menu.
I won with: biodynamic hen yolk drizzled with tomato salsa with a side of wild boar belly served with potato au gratin ( thus eggs with tomato sauce, bacon and hash brown) I'm pretty damn good at it if I must say so myself.
- Also I cannot watch SATC with ND around, he outfeminists me when watching it and goes on minirants about women perpetuating the beauty myth through magazines and watching shows like SATC. Call me shallow, but I really am just watching it for the fashion. Also Carrie should have married Aidan. Stupid Carrie.
- Speaking of shallow, I really want the Karlie Kloss haircut. I don't think my hair can take curls. Argh.
- I read somewhere that pubic lice are becoming extinct due to more and more people taking everything off down there. I'm not quite sure about this... but if it's true then it's a good thing?
- Oh, this is niiiice.
- In response to a story about a Queensland mother being asked to be more discreet with her breastfeeding at a public pool, Kochie (the TV presenter) said it was ''fair enough'' that an attendant had asked her to move. Hundreds of angry women are now going to rock up at the studios for a nurse-in. Uhm. Milk for everyone! Marketing opportunities for nursing bras. I'm glad I don't watch Sunrise and I'm glad that I don't know anyone nuts enough to participate in the nurse-in.
- What does moonshine taste like anyway? Should I try and get hold of some?
- I hate the phrase 'In your face.' It's just so.. rude.
- Governor Arthur Phillip died of rolling his wheelchair out of a an upper story window. Which is quite an undignified way to die. I guess that's why when you look it up, it never specifies how it happened.
- I went to a travel agent to enquire about tickets to Japan and he gave me a quote of $1400.
Yup. $1400. And then he said that prices were only going to get higher and I should buy them for ND without consultation. I think he thought I was an idiot. A rich idiot. A rich idiot without internet. This is why travel agents are going out of business.
- Safety not Guaranteed
- Life of Pi
- Beasts of the Southern Wild
- Ghostbusters
- Weekend at Bernies (I could not finish this, it was that awful. I understand people's love is tinged with nostalgia. but I hated everyone in this movie. )
- Monster Ark (I only lasted 15 minutes with this on Tv. Blerk.)
- The adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert (still so good)
- Man, I am really broke. Broke, broke. Not quite living on the street but if I don't stop spending money on expensive shampoo, I'm gonna get there.
- I had the Life of Pi ending all wrong (for how many years?!) until I watched the movie and had it spelled out for me. Shame shame.
- I still don't know why Lance Armstrong has chosen to come out now?? Dude, I don't know why you didn't just stick with ambiguity.
- Quokkas are damn cute. See? Who could resist a face like that?
- Ray, when someone asks you if you're a God, you say yes!
- ND and I play a game called douche menu where we try and turn ordinary food into an item on a fine dining menu.
I won with: biodynamic hen yolk drizzled with tomato salsa with a side of wild boar belly served with potato au gratin ( thus eggs with tomato sauce, bacon and hash brown) I'm pretty damn good at it if I must say so myself.
- Also I cannot watch SATC with ND around, he outfeminists me when watching it and goes on minirants about women perpetuating the beauty myth through magazines and watching shows like SATC. Call me shallow, but I really am just watching it for the fashion. Also Carrie should have married Aidan. Stupid Carrie.
- Speaking of shallow, I really want the Karlie Kloss haircut. I don't think my hair can take curls. Argh.
- I read somewhere that pubic lice are becoming extinct due to more and more people taking everything off down there. I'm not quite sure about this... but if it's true then it's a good thing?
- Oh, this is niiiice.
- In response to a story about a Queensland mother being asked to be more discreet with her breastfeeding at a public pool, Kochie (the TV presenter) said it was ''fair enough'' that an attendant had asked her to move. Hundreds of angry women are now going to rock up at the studios for a nurse-in. Uhm. Milk for everyone! Marketing opportunities for nursing bras. I'm glad I don't watch Sunrise and I'm glad that I don't know anyone nuts enough to participate in the nurse-in.
- What does moonshine taste like anyway? Should I try and get hold of some?
- I hate the phrase 'In your face.' It's just so.. rude.
- Governor Arthur Phillip died of rolling his wheelchair out of a an upper story window. Which is quite an undignified way to die. I guess that's why when you look it up, it never specifies how it happened.
- I went to a travel agent to enquire about tickets to Japan and he gave me a quote of $1400.
Yup. $1400. And then he said that prices were only going to get higher and I should buy them for ND without consultation. I think he thought I was an idiot. A rich idiot. A rich idiot without internet. This is why travel agents are going out of business.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
It's a big world
The Door to Hell in Turkmenistan
Moravia, Czech Republic
Tulip Fields, Netherland
Lake Retba, SengalEven though I am as content with my life as I'll ever be, there's still a part of me that yearns for to be somewhere else. I know it's ingrained in the human condition to always want and that really I should be thanking my lucky stars that I'm not in a jail somewhere being beaten.
But I guess you can't really look at a picture of Lake Retba and not wanting to be floating down a sea of milkshake.
If you'd like to join me in my daydreams, click here.
(Off topic: I took down yesterday's post because I didn't think it was good enough. This writing thing is a struggle.)
Monday, January 14, 2013
Don't go away
Aaron Swartz's death was a punch in the appendix. It was his age. It was the industry I work in, filled with hundreds of budding Aaron Swartz's. It was the way he left the building and why he chose to do it. And not at the very least, the immense waste of talent.
At this moment in time, you can find hundreds, maybe thousands of In Memoriams to Aaron Swartz. You just have to hit up Google. So I am not going to talk to you about individual liberties, and political activism and government persecution, other people will discuss it better and with more eloquence.
So I only came in here today to say this:
You are never alone as you think you are. If you are not coping, get help. Talk to someone. Call a friend and say "I am not okay." It's four words. Maybe they'll be the hardest words you ever have to say, but you have to say them for someone to hear you.
I don't know what your problems are from this side of the screen, but the solution isn't to leave a hole in the universe where you used to be.
I don't think Aaron could have been able to see how much he would be missed either. Seriously, talk to someone, anyone. Don't bottle it all in to build up to a decision that is completely irreversible. Someone would miss you too.
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