The deluded Lattanzi's and the housing crisis

So I was watching a youtube clip of Matt and Chloe Lattanzi [respectively the ex-husband and daughter of Olivia Newton John] don't ask me why I was watching it, I just was.

So goes this little bit of hilariousness

Chloe: [stressed because she has to sing a Britney song in front of an audience]
I just want to be alone! far away from everyone judging you. Everyone judges you!*

Matt: [completely po-faced] This is why I live in a teepee.


WAHAHAHAHA

Oh, Matt. Matt. Matt. We judge you more because you live in a teepee.

*I'm paraphrasing, there's no way I'm watching that crazy weepy shit again

Mush is a doofus #45454093094

While making coffee:

*ching* I hear money falling onto the floor and being the good citizen that I am, I say to the couple standing in front of me

"Excuse me, I'm not sure if you heard but I think you might've dropped money on the floor"

The guy smiles at me and picks it up.

Later on when he orders coffee, I realise that he is actually deaf.

Whoops.

My weeknd in mathematical numbers

Things I gained and lost over the long weekend: [Lets pretend I started off Thursday with 30 points]

-Lost dignity on George Street -20 points

-Lost sim card also on George Street- 5 points

-Borrowed a tremendously cute costume +10 points

-That costume had a missing zip and the skirt kept falling down -5 points

-Was having fun at work +15 points

-Sb's workmates were nice and sociable +10 points

-Didn't drink at all [I couldn't], so they thought I was soft -5 points

-I think I forgot to say goodbye to the birthday boy. Whoops -5 points

- Another night and no drinks -10 points [well there was minor drinking but I was still in recovery from Thursday]

- Dylmahs friends were also nice and sociable [although one of them was so boring, I almost cried into my vodka red bull.. but she was nice] I'm lucky all the people this weekend were friendly +15 points

- Dylmah apologised for not coming with me on Thursday and I never get apologies from him [they're like fairy dust] so +5 points

-But then he broke my camera! -15 points.

-I really did like Moulin Rouge. That was some funky club +10 points

-I left early -5 points

-St Marys Church is actually quite cool at 3:30 in the morning. Its peaceful +5 points

- Work was hell on earth and I scalded my hand and cried into people's coffees. Salty. -5000 points

End result: -4970 points. God, work always ends up ruining my weekend. Damn I was coming ahead as well

When I think about you I touch myself!

So I was running late to work this morning and to get to work I need to cross the Darling Harbour bridge. Normally this bridge is packed with tourists but it was wet and cold and generally blah.

So I'm huffing and puffing by, when I spot this girl [aged about thirty, short haired, European] walking past and there was something odd about her..

Holy Shit, her hand is down her pants and she's going at herself!

For the undelicately eared among you. Holy Crap, she's masturbating!

Good thing there were not too many tourists around, they might have taken photos.

Europeans are such exhibitionists.

So I get to work and I'm deeply deeply disturbed. Look I'm all for open sexuality and public discussion of sexual taboos, but there are some things I don't want to see, and lady you rubbing your coochie is one of them.

I've gathered my co-workers around and am relaying my coochie woes.

Co-worker1: She could just be itchy!

Co-worker 2: It was cold today, maybe she was just warming her hands

Me: Her hand, and no.

Co-worker1: Maybe she was adjusting her underpants.

Co-worker 2: Maybe she was adjusting her menstrual pad.

[Long pause]

Everybody: Ew.

Pink Toaster!

I found it!

So lets all squee for my pink toaster!

SQUEE!

My life is an anecdote

Me: Hello Sir, what would you like?

Customer: Do you have cwanbewwy?

Me: [Straightest face ever] Yes, we have cranberry

Customer: Well, I would like some cwanbewwy and wodka

He's having me on right? This guy was 5"9 and built like a tank and he talked like Elmer Fudd.

---

So I crashed my car on Wednesday and I dragged my fender all the way home. I'm thinking when my cousin Matt sees it, he's going to wish he put it in storage. Anyway, I was upset but its nice that when the chips are down [or at least horribly dented] that there are friends who will go out of their way to help you, I had not one but three offers to help me to take it to a smash repairer. Aww, much love to you guys.

---

This bartender [I'm thinking he was in jest] called me the angriest person he's ever met. Seriously? I'm probably in the running for most sarcastic and I'm coming in third for most self-conscious but the angriest? I have yet to kungfu kick anybody in the nuts or whomp someone on the head with a beer bottle. Sif angriest.

---

So I went with Mystic Meg to see a psychic yesterday and its a store connected to a day spa connected to an organic hairdresser. Anyway, I was waiting for her when all of a sudden this Russian [?] man comes up to me and starts pumping my hand.
"HellomynameisMichelandImgoingtolookafteryoutodaythankyouforcomingwhatwouldyoulikedonetoday?"
And I'm trying to interrupt this little speech, but he's talking at full speed still holding my hand, when this lady coughs and says "Er, I think you're after me", he lets go of my hand at sonic speed, turns around and delivers the almost same speech to her! "HellomynameisMicheland...."
I guess that hairdresser is not absorbing any psychic vibes coming from the shop.

---

I picked up a pendulum in the same shop and was playing around with it. Not to be skeptical, but surely the wind affects how it moves right? If it moves side to side then its a boy, and its moves round then its a girl. Not that I'm pregnant or anything. But I'm curious to have someone explain to me exactly *who they think is pushing the pendulum. [yes, the wind. Shutup]

---

My stepdad bought my mum a ten dollar toaster and of course [of course!] it doesn't work properly so I offered her my one [Its a designer toaster!] and went to Myers to look for a pink toaster to match my pink spatula/saucepan/teapot [I'm aiming for a completely pink kitchen]. I remembered seeing one ages ago so I asked the saleslady about it. She told me that it had been discontinued and replaced with a fawn colour. A fawn colour. Erk, a fawn colour.. who uses brown toasters?! People who want to match the toast to the toaster.

List of people that probably would enjoy a fawn coloured toaster:
Hunters
People who decorate their kitchen in varying shades of brown.
Colour blind people.
Nutsos.

The saleslady was very nice and thought she remembered a toaster that may have had a pink border. No, that was also replaced by fawn. Look for my puke, it will also be fawn coloured.

I left completely bitter as not only did they not have my pink toaster but they also didn't sell Indiana Jones action figures. Stupid store.

So many Mushes, what to do?

*Ring ring [Thats a ringing phone.. ]

Dakota: Hey Mush, guess what?

Mush: [lottery/accidents/marriage..] ..what?

Dakota: I was in the city and I saw a girl who looked like you! Down to the boots and the hair.

Mush: Oh? Apparently there's a lot of me roaming around

Dakota: So I ran up to her and smacked her on the butt!

Mush: WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. erm.. did she like that?

Dakota: She said "What the fuck?!"

Mush: Maybe her friends don't smack her on the butt as often as my friends smack me on the butt!

Dakota: I apologised, then she got really pissy and stomped off.

Mush: WAHAHAHAAHAHA..

Dakota: Lucky I didn't grab her ass.

[Aww, my poor clone.. can't even walk down the street without being molested!]

Randomnessly..

-I still love Indiana Jones. He can enter my temple of doom anytime! [Or my temple of lurveeee.]

-I've started reading crime novels. Am currently reading "The Devil's feather"- the problem is it's not scary.

-I've also started liking champagne. As I grow older, it tastes less like cat pee.

- The three types of footballs for the three types of football are Sherrin, Gilbert and Steedon [Shit, I hope thats right!]

-Poker nights are always better when you wear jeans.

-Having your eyebrows waxed doesn't really hurt that much

-I drove all the way to Chatswood and back.. by myself! I'm so proud, I'm patting myself on the back.

-My supe Dan gave me a fridge magnet. Its a Star City fridge magnet. What am I going to do with a Star City fridge magnet?

Sometimes you just have to refrain from the jokes

So I have this friend called Mystic Meg. We are calling her this because 1) I'm playing altogether too much Phoenix Wright on the ds and 2) She is the believe-iest person I have ever met* She tells fortunes, sees psychics and not in the light hearted way. That girl is into that stuff. She doesn't really joke about it, and sometimes I have trouble not joking about it. Observe.

---

Over a lunch of chicken foot salad [for real] and tomato sea snail vermicelli [also for real]

Mm: So I went to see this group of psychics and one of them was just staring at me!

Me: Why?

Mm: Well I went to ask her and she said "You're an angel."

Me: An angel? What?

Mm: Well not exactly an angel. But more like a pixie.

Me: You're a pixie.

Mm: Thats what she said! I have a bright light around me.

Me: Chicks, you're not a pixie.

Mystic Meg then looks at me like I stepped on a baby or something.

Sigh.

So introducing Mystic Meg! The only person I know who knows what epsom salts really do [truly, I thought they woke people up from fainting but actually you use them to bathe. See? you do learn stuff on this blog. Occasionally] It makes life more fun and more interesting to have friends who have varied interests .. No I'm not harping on you, my fifteen medi-science friends.

* She officially trumped Lovey who once told the people at work that her psychic said that her children were angels who hadn't been born yet. But that once they relinquished angel status then they would be coming down her fallopian tubes. I didn't know what to say to this. This really mean girl said openly to her face that it was ridiculous. And.. not good form ok? Upsetting people is bad. Upsetting nice people is extra bad. Don't do it.

Dear Coldplay

Dear Coldplay,

You're back. Omg. Why are you so awesome? Do you know your awesomeness is making my head explode?

Mush

P.s You've reduced me to a gibbering fangirl. Again. I must lay at your feet.

P.p.s I took my love down to violet hill
There we sat in snow
All that time she was silent still

So if you love me
Won't you let me know?

Life goes on

So a couple of months ago, Sb and I caught a bus [yes, he caught a bus. Its amazing, I know], we boarded and I was just daydreaming random thoughts out the window. [Peanut butter/coloured pencils/world peace/the taste of blu tack] when the bus stopped and on boarded four girls about my age.

Well no big deal right? I watched them for a little while- and they were just four ordinary girls laughing, talking about boys and work, maybe going somewhere to eat.

There was all this closeness and camaraderie being taken for granted. And I swear I have never been struck by this sensation before [I'll try and describe it properly for you] but I felt envy. I was choked and blocked off by this envy- in fact I could feel myself physically getting nauseous, I was trying to swallow this bile and I knew I was going green [see? I thought that was a myth, but you actually go green]
Sb shook me a bit and asked me if I was ok because I was looking a little pale.

They got off at the next stop, and when they left, the envy dispersed and all I felt was incredibly sad. The fact that the three of us would never ever do something so simple and ordinary again, we would see each other again for sure but something so everyday was not going to happen and if it did, it would not be for a really long time. When we got off the bus, I had to stop and have a little cry for that loss.

Every now and then, I think of those four girls and I have a little twinge. Last night I thought about how much more self sufficient I've gotten since they've left, I stood up and brushed myself off and headed home. Life goes on, but it doesn't stop you from having a twinge once in a while.

Mush the social butterfly on Saturday night

Saturday night

6:00- Sb is flailing wildly "We're going to be LATE. Hurry Up! Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiish!" [repeat that sentence about sixteen times during the course of five minutes]

6:05- I'm frantically trying to ignore him, end up jamming my legs into two pairs of hose which incidentally have about nine runs in it. Three which look like wolverine has taken a swipe at my knee. And a massive hole on the thigh which is about the size of a burger.

6:07- "Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiish!"

6:08- Oh fuck it, I'll just go with these tights. They're going to be under boots anyway and no-one will see them so who cares right?

6:09- SB: "Errrr, what happened to your knee? It looks like you got into a fight with Wolverine"
Me: "Shut up. Or I'm heading back to get changed!"
SB does the sensible thing and doesn't remark on it anymore although he'll occasionally furrow his brow and look at my legs and sigh. Not longingly.

7:10- After racing to get there, and liberally swearing at every [Asian] driver that we see. We arrive!

7:11- Hmmm.. its awkward already. Why are the tables divided like that?! They've joined two round tables together like a figure eight and the first table is full while the second table is like the leftover table. We've been consigned to the kids table! Man, I'm glad that I wasn't in charge of the booking because I would've ripped that hosts ears off his head and made him eat them.

7:20- Mrs Moo gets up and tries to make conversation with me, it starts off with "You still have a cold! Last time I saw you, you had a cold!"
Me: "Its cold?"
Ok neither of us are going to win awards for beautiful conversation flow.

7:22- I'm on the other side on the big table talking to Mrs Gold about my eyelashes. I would really rather talk about anything else other than my lashes. Chinese politics, serial killers, whether the smurfs are overrated, something anything.

7:24- There's only really so much you can talk about lashes. I've covered two minutes worth.. I'm starting to get really awkward. I mean its boring for her [who wants to hear it?!] and its boring for me.

7:25: Mrs Moo releases me "You look quite embarrassed, maybe you want to go back?"

7:25- Back in my seat, I never realised how much I love my seat. I bet this seat never felt so much love.

7:35- Wheeee! Dakota is here! Wait, thats not Dakota. It's a pink, puffy version of her
She's completely sunburnt. It's sort of hilarious, she's like a beacon.

7:45- 8:30: While I eat, Dakota and Sb mock squabble. I'm enjoying the mock squabbling, except when they get really excited and lean and do it over my food.

9:00- We were going to tip the waiter out two dollars but we were nice and upped it to six.

9:10- Standing on the street deciding what to do.

9:15- Still deciding.

9:16- 9:30 We're going to Eric's place and subsequently I have an in-car meltdown.
Sb: Whats wrong
Me: we're going to Eric's place? Does that mean we have to take off our shoes?
Sb: Yes, we're asian
Me: I CAN'T TAKE OFF MY SHOES. * Yoinks a boot off and lobs it.
It is revealed that my tights have now accumulated more runs and more holes and now look like something even Oliver Twist would be ashamed of ["Tsk. tsk. Madam, your appearance is detestable!"]. There are even runs on the toes. How you get runs on the toes, I don't know. I was sitting the entire time
Sb: Whoa. Do you want to go home?
Me: *snippy, No we will go and I will sit awkwardly.

9:26- We arrive at Eric's place, where I speedily jump on the couch arrange my skirt over my legs and sit uber awkwardly.

9:30: Oh, the legs they are killing me.

9:45- Ahoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooga! The legs, they are beyond pissed off.

9:45- Oh forget it. I commandeer Sb's jumper and wrap it around my legs. Oh sweet relief. What a waste of yoga class.

9:46- Sb complains he's cold. Ha

10:05- It's cake time! Oh, crap I have to walk over. I shuffle reluctantly to the dining table and perch awkwardly on the edge of a chair. I'm walking so slowly that I'm thinking that they're thinking I'm being anti-social.

10:06- Return to my spot on the couch with strawberry cheesecake. I'm starting to feel bad about not mingling.

10:30- Mrs Furter falls asleep on the couch

10:45- Mrs Moo falls asleep on the couch [it's a big couch]

00:00- I'm starting to fall asleep .. zzz.. The only person still awake on the lounge is Mrs Ken. The boys are playing poker and taking shots. Darn, I want to drink shots and play poker. Stupid tights. I wake up to the tv playing a trance song which involves women having milkshakes being poured on them in a sexual way, except it doesn't look sexual -it looks gross. I feel sorry for those girls I hope they get good commission.

2:00- Time to go home! Oh God, I'm so bleary. On the way home, SB accuses me of being anti-social. I wearily pull another hole in my tights for his benefit and he doesn't say anything, we are both wishing that I wore jeans tonight. [Well, actually he was quite smooshed so maybe I'm projecting. I definitely wish I wore jeans]

It's too early. Eek

It is six thirty in the morning. I am never on the computer at six thirty. I want to go back to sleep. Zzz.. Unfortunately my girlfriend duties include

- Being nice
-Reminders to take out the garbage [this involves being nice]
- And marking his f#@*%ing essays every month or so.

And so it goes when you date somebody whose English is not his first language [that wasn't gramatically correct, was it? I'm obviously in no position to mark anything. It's six thirty in the morning! Shut up and leave me alone!]

..I'm so jumpy when I'm tired. And now I'm peaky to the max. I heard this 'ksssssssh' sound behind me and I almost gave myself whiplash trying to see what it was. It turns out it was a piece of paper falling to the ground. Thats right. A piece of paper. Stationary is freaking me out. I'd like to go back to sleep please before I hurt myself.

I'm thinking to have a red bull. Is it too early to have Red bull? I'm thinking too much sugar.. but I have no access to coffee [see? Priorities. Red bull first. Coffee second]

How to get out of dinner on Saturday

This Saturday, I'm having dinner with Sb's friends. It will be the first time I've seen them since November. I'm just going to eat and not answer any questions.

When they ask me "So are you and SB...?"

Me: Grhgerjwhd *stuff my face with ribs

Her: Hey, you've let your eyebrows go!

Me: hiuhihloihuhu. hu..hu.. *chews frantically

Her: Long time no see! Where've you been?

Me: Rarrrfrarrffrarrrff [Translation: I've been around]

Her or him: Well I'm glad you guys made it!

Me: Erk. *Chokes to death on bone and dies.

----- Later on in Heaven..

Me: Well thanks a lot God for getting me out of that awkward situation. Do you think you could've tried something a little less extreme? like a kitchen fire or a thunderstorm instead of my DEATH?

God: Well it got you out of any more questions didn't it?!

Me: True that. Amen#.

---

#This is a fictional story, I do not intend to die on Saturday night, especially not on a bone. If I die, it's going to be in the middle of a giant orgasm or in my sleep [or both] and I would probably not talk to God like that, because he might zap me for talking to him so disrespectfully. I am sure I will have fun. Um, if I don't have fun- I will eat. And eat. And eat.

Family hidden treasure [My great grandfather is mean]

So last night, it was once again the combined treat of mother's day and Sb's birthday. Every May I am ridiculously poor.

Anyway we were sitting around snarfling up angus beef [my treat. I am so. poor.] when the subject of ancestors came up, and my aunty started talking about her granddad aka my great-granddad and what he used to do in China. I was surprised to find he was a judge/bureaucrat of some sort and apparently the old man was rolling in the moolah, if you know what I'm saying [what? I'm not saying he was corrupt... the rich bureaucrat...]

Well there was a war on at the time and the whole family had to leave the compound [compound!] for a while but he didn't really think it was a good idea to take so much jewellery/gold bars/faberge eggs with them so he decided to hoard all the treasure together and bury them in a cement pole in the compound. When they left, he swore that he would tell his eldest daughter which pole he hid it in on his death bed.

The problem with this is, he DIDN'T tell his daughter [my now dead grandmother] he croaked before he could tell her [WHAT?!] and now there's a whole booty of jewels sitting in a pole in a village in China somewhere. Or feeding the family of the luckiest construction worker that ever lived. Who knows?*

*I don't mean to sound flip but actually I'm extremely anguished about this, I mean to torment my grandchildren with stories of hidden treasure . I would look at them thoughtfully and tell them "I've buried some jewellery......." pause meaningfully then die of a heart attack.

Talking with the ghost at work.

I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but there is a ghost in the lift at work. According to my fellow bartenders/waiters/hired help- he likes to randomly open the doors of the lift and turn the dishwasher on and off. One girl even described how 'eerie' the lift is.

According to work legend, an elderly man died in the theatre next door and from now, he chooses to haunt the lift.

"Err.. Why would you haunt a lift when you can haunt a theatre? In the theatre you can play with trapdoors/ remove people's wigs/ play with the lighting/eat popcorn"
She just looked at me solemnly "Because thats where he wants to be"

So anyway I didn't find him too scary, sometimes it was minorly irritating when the lift would "bing!" and you would look up and there would be no-one there.

The other thing I'm always conscious of, is that the lift is quite small so when I'm taking the bins down or the food trolley I'm always hoping that I'm not stepping IN him. According to the movies The Grudge and The Eye, ghosts like to stand in the back of lifts and make faces at you - I don't know if that's true but it keeps me from standing in the back of the lift.

So last night, I was stacking glassware when I heard the lift go "bing!" and I looked up and of course, there was no-one there, but the doors remained open. So I stood there and waited for it to close.

..
..
..

Apparently you shouldn't whistle at night time because its like speaking to the dead, well how else was I going to get the door closed.. I wasn't going to stand there all night waiting for it.

..

So I whistled. A jaunty little "woo-woo!"

..

"Bing!" The doors closed!

Am I amazing or what? I can communicate with ghosts!

The restaurant is closed

Since my mum closed down the restaurant, I haven't been back to see the block. In fact, I'm not even sure if I want see the block. In times of need, I find myself veering towards Chinatown hoping to make a free phonecall and grab a bottle of Sprite and to see if my mum wants to chat and I find myself stopping halfway through my step and thinking "Hey! It's not there anymore" and so I turn around and head to Mexicana's place and .. oh for God's sake, is there anything still standing anymore? Well apparently Starbucks is open til ten o clock.

For years I've hated the place- I never hated the Parramatta/North Sydney Shinjus as much as I *loathed the Chinatown one. It was dark, dingy and it smelt perpetually like fried meat and old eggs, the dinginess gave it an unhappy character- I think it probably felt to some degree unloved.. One reviewer said that it was 'the ugly stepsister' of the Shinju family. Nice. I was always endlessly competing for it in my mum's affections. Which came first? The restaurant or the daughter? 99 out of a 100 times the restaurant came first, a fact of life as a restaurant child. [I can see it to some degree happening to my friend Bear's child, I mentioned it to her and she just laughed at me. Poor little bear- I wonder if she'll grow up with the kind of resentment I did?]

But as much as I resented the place, grew weary with its smells and looks. It was still somewhere I could go- a place where I definitely knew where my mum would be. It was my territory- woe betide the hapless waiter who thought that he could deny this random stranger anything. Many a time I've walked down and picked up the phone to the gawping waitstaff while they whispered franticly among themselves "who is that? what should we do?" .. then my mum would walk through the archway and I would wave cheerily "Hi Mum!". You could literally see them melt into puddles of relief as they nixed contemplating the idea of calling the police while wrestling me to the floor for the phone [to call the police].

I'm uncomfortable with it, I'm uncomfortable without it. I catch myself thinking about it wistfully and then remembering the odor which makes me wince. There is nothing connecting me to Chinatown anymore and that makes me sad. The 28 years of history or so lost in a powder of rubble and yet, how many times have I complained to Sb that they should demolish the entire thing and restart again. Be careful what you wish for, you might just end up without that comfort zone you've always hated.

Mexicana's Birthday

Well its Monday and I'm still bleary from Friday and Saturday nights. What can I tell you? That girl is a bad influence! [Of course, there's a good chance that many people would say it was the other way round...]

I'm so bright and fresh at the beginning of these photoes, and I get progressively more erk and gluggy. And then there are a whole heap of photoes which I don't even remember!


The poncho which I had to talk Mexicana out of wearing.


The spread from Seoul-Ria. I do believe that the owner misses us. We've spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars there and now that we don't go anymore I think he won't be able to put his kids through college [true story!]






Look at Dave, he's so cool! Or hypnotised by the fingers.


Why does everyone look so awake, except ME?


Sometimes I think I still have lemon mouth as a result of my braces. Blah. braces.









So after Sublime we head to Pontoon, and thus begins my walk of shame..


Hey, he shrunk!


Apparently I get all kissy and huggy when I'm inebriated [Its an Asian repession thing]. The guy behind us however is totally getting off on it.


I have no idea who or what is going on in this photo. Let's presume that I didn't take it




Much love for the vodka redbulls


I shouldn't look so happy because right after this I was evicted from Pontoon. I didn't think it was possible but it is. I did it. My mother should be so proud. No seriously, I've never been bounced from anywhere in my entire life. The bouncer was waiting for me outside the bathroom and said "It's time to go" and I'm quite aware of what happens when you argue with a bouncer.. they beat your arse with a stick, so I did the smart thing and left with dignity. Well, as much dignity as you can with a 200 pound gorilla following you out of a club.


Where did the crate come from?!


And Nick takes revenge for the endless photoes...


I can't believe she still looks so fresh at four in the morning! *disgust



And thus ends the night. There were other photoes but my internet connection is being rather bastardly and is preventing me from doing anymore. It was a great night and I really hope she had a fantastic birthday [the parts that she can remember of course!]

Happy shiny people

So we had what we would like to term as "a massive night" where everybody was rip-roaring drunk [well most of us] but somehow it was kind of a letdown. Maybe I'm getting old. Maybe it was too wet. I don't even remember much of it and still it was kind of a moot night. Blah.




See that scotch glass? We uhh.. stole it from Moretons. I was hurrying him up to move to Bungalow and he was "I haven't finished my drink!" Thats when we had the bright idea to take the glass with us.. serves them right for not having take-away alcohol!



Dakota was supposed to be in this photo, but she's not there? And I don't know what James is doing



The hair is clearly STRAW COLOURED. It may be whats making me so mopey



That picture is so cute! But I have no idea who that guy is. MD said his name was Kevin. Except I thought her boyfriends name was Chris. And .. I hope I didn't call him Chris all night.



Hee.



I love it. Thats the "stop aiming that camera in my face" look.



And I don't remember his name either! Oops. Though clearly he's not even looking at the actual camera so there's a very good chance he can't remember my name as well! [Kenny? was it kenny?]





I had to try three times before I could get a non blurry shot. I think that's Dylmahs finger.




And.. I think Simon is sick of this and wants to go home!






Noodles and breasts!



Clearly, clearly sick of this!



And the drunk specimens retire home.

Next week I will reunite with Mexicana! Let the craziness begin! Are you excited? I'm excited.

It's a job well done!

So I went to get my hair coloured yesterday and I pointed out that I wanted red and gold highlights. [I'm feeling very autumn-y, yes.] So at the annointed time, the hairdresser washed the colour off and blow dried my hair, beaming at her job. She was very proud.

I squinted at my self, rubbed my eyes for a bit [very hard to do with lash extensions] and finally gave up and asked her.. "Where are the red bits?"

She points at a single stripe of red and goes "Here!"

..

..

I think it's a time I went to a new hairdresser.